


lay down in this fire

by sandyk



Category: NCIS: Los Angeles
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-13
Updated: 2013-09-13
Packaged: 2017-12-26 11:11:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/965256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandyk/pseuds/sandyk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They went to Oklahoma together, even though it's a ridiculously land locked state with no surfing at all. Kensi told him it was the only state she'd never been to. Marty suspects she's lying, but it's such a weird thing to lie about, he goes anyway. (Post Descent.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> not for profit, not mine. Title and quotes from Lori McKenna's this fire. Thanks to jf for the beta!

Will you love me when I'm angry  
Will you bring me my spirit when my soul is dry  
Will you give me your forever  
Will you lay down in this fire?

They went to Oklahoma together, even though it's a ridiculously land locked state with no surfing at all. Kensi told him it was the only state she'd never been to. Marty suspects she's lying, but it's such a weird thing to lie about, he goes anyway. 

It's three months and three weeks after he first kissed her. He's had reconstructive surgery and physical therapy and mandated therapy. They kindly flew in Nate from somewhere scary that ended in a "n" to be his personal shrink. But he was mostly okay, so he usually tried to convince Nate to sneak off and spend all his time with Rose.

"We should vacation together," is how Kensi said it. "Let's finally do it. Do you want to?"

He wrote YES YES GOOD PLAN. His jaw was still wired shut. 

When he can talk, he tells Nate: he remembers Sam looming over him, face wide and scared. Marty tried to say "this fucking haircut, right?" He thinks it came out as bubbles of blood and   
strangled sounds. He thinks it was probably worse for Sam to see than for Marty to experience. 

He remembers light, no light, hospital smells, and one time he could smell the ocean. It's weird he remembers that it was only one time because he doesn't really have a timeline in his head for being unconscious and worked on by doctors. 

He remembers nightmares. Sam suffocating him with one hand, Callen clawing at his cheek. He saw Kensi covered in blood, he was so close he could where it had matted in her hair and on her ponytail holder. He screamed at her and couldn't get her to hear or move. 

He opened his eyes and watched the doctors talk. He couldn't talk. 

He listened to Michelle reading to him. She said something about a gorilla and her voice was thick with tears. Michelle inhaled her shaky breath and then said, "Marty, we are not reading that one again. I mean ever." He opened his eyes and she pressed her lips together. "You're awake."

He tried to nod. She smiled and handed him a tablet. He could use both his hands, sort of. He could tap out messages. He typed R U OKAY? BOMBS? KENSI?

She looked down and then back at him. "It's all good. Everything is fine. Everyone is fine."

He typed EXCEPT ME. 

She smiled. "You're getting better." She told him Sam made him green juice smoothies every morning that the nurses dutifully made sure Marty consumed. He typed that he didn't remember that. She told him they'd had this conversation three times already. 

"You always ask the same thing," she said. Sam would be here, she said, but he was back to work. Everyone was back to work. "There's a lot of clean up. Which I can not (cannot) do because I am now permanently retired." Even though he knew she had said that three times already, she looked like these were wounds to utter. 

He typed CAN I STILL HAVE KIDS? THE FUN WAY? 

She laughed. "Yes," she said. "The doctors can explain it but they didn't get that to full torture experience. You got off pretty easy, considering."

MY BEAUTIFUL TEETH. He drew a sad face. 

"You're getting even prettier ones, promise." Michelle had a gorgeous smile. 

He typed DON'T READ ME THAT STORY AGAIN. BUT I LIKE THAT BOOK. OTHER STORIES ARE OKAY, JUST NOT THAT ONE. 

xx

Hetty told him his heart stopped on the operating table when they first brought him in. "The first surgery," she said. "In case you have any memories of white lights and beckoning hands, you chose to come back to us, apparently. I am very glad you did, Detective." She patted his hand and her hand was trembling. 

xx

KENSI he typed. She smiled, eyes rimmed with red. DOES IT LOOK LIKE I'M SMIZING, CAUSE I'M TRYING TO SMIZE.

She laughed. 

He typed WE KISSED!!

"I know," she said. "We did. You kissed me and I had to go save Michelle's life. And you saved Sam's and now we're all good." She leaned over and kissed his forehead. He looked down her shirt. She was wearing a very boring white racerback bra. She smelled like lack of sleep. 

She sat back down. THAT DOES NOT COUNT AS A SECOND KISS, he typed. 

"I know," she said. 

HOW MANY TIMES HAVE WE HAD THIS CONVERSATION??

"This is the fifth time. You're on a lot of painkillers. You had some head wounds. You had a really bad infection in your leg and hip. It takes time to get everything back," she said. "What's funny is, you always say we kissed. It's either the first or second thing."

HARD TO FORGET! He smized again with all his might. 

"Today's the first time you made that smize joke," she said. "It made me laugh."

xx

Three of his stab wounds on his leg and hip were infected and two were antibiotic resistant. "It's not from the hospital, though. It's from where Siderov had you. Or maybe what he used to wound you. He probably didn't sterilize them after previous use," Nell said. She had taken it on herself to explain to him his medical news. He wondered if she thought he was too dumb to get what the doctors said. Probably it was just the only way she could think to help. 

She was very familiar with all the ins and outs of negotiating hospitals, so she was very helpful. 

It was a week before he realized she must have done this before, for someone she loved. Maybe they didn't make it.

"So you're on a lot of medication and they're also working on your jaw," she flipped through the chart. "There are a lot of side effects you could have and some might be interactions and some might be from the meds and some could be symptoms of pretty bad things. So be very precise about how you're feeling." 

SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE A NUT he wrote. 

"You think you're funny," she said. 

xx

"Actually, we wrapped things up pretty quickly so I've been watching Monty," Kensi said. 

OKAY GOOD, he typed. 

"But I'm already back at work, I have been. You know. New cases. I have a temporary partner, too." She looked a little abashed. 

He was high as a kite on painkillers and the serious antibiotics and everything. He was on a lot of drugs. He typed, SO ARE YOU DUMPING ME AND MONTY? THAT'S NOT COOL. IS IT BECAUSE I'M MISSING FIVE TEETH? I'M GETTING THEM BACK. FAKE BUT PRETTY.

"I am not dumping you. My partner is temporary. I haven't even brought her back to my apartment. Sam keeps telling the poor girl not to get used to playing with the big boys, that's our boy Deeks's seat. And I love Monty but since I'm back at work I feel like Monty is getting depressed again. I was going to say, Monty's going to stay with my mom."

JULIA LIKES DOGS?

"She's happy to have Monty. He really likes her yard," she said. 

He knew what Nell had listed for him, all the drugs, his injuries, the unspoken "and also you were tortured and almost died" stuff. Everything was pretty clearly spelling out he should not be making emotional decisions. Or starting emotional discussions. He wanted to anyway. 

HEY, SO ARE WE GOING OUT NOW?

Kensi smiled. "Kinda hard to date when you can't leave this room."

DON'T DEFECT. DEFLECT. DON'T DO EITHER. He was worried, a little, she would act like nothing happened just because he was damaged heap of crap. For now. 

"I'm not defecting or avoiding the topic. We can talk about it. When you can talk. And your eyes aren't so dilated from all the drugs. I want to talk, I swear."

LIAR.

xx

He finally saw Sam for the first time (he knew it wasn't the first time, but it was the first time he remembered) since Siderov at the place he was sent after the hospital. He thought of it as the halfway house. Sam dropped off more juices in labeled containers. "Don't worry, I checked with your doctors, it's all approved. They said it was a great idea." 

Marty nodded. "Looks good," he said. "Yummy." His voice sounded weird. 

Sam nodded, too. This was his apology, Marty thought. He could probably demand more penance than kale and chia seeds mixed with almond milk, but he wasn't up for it. 

They were men and men stared and said it all with manly nods. Marty was down with that. 

He was on a lot of pills at the halfway house. 

"This is, like, my first reaction to something. Bad reaction. To a pill," he said to Nell. "Super painful hives. Specifically on my legs and my private parts. Finally, I don't have that, pardon my language, torturous catheter in me and now I have hives. On my private parts."

Nell looked at his legs and made a face of disgust. "Did you tell the doctors?"

"First thing. They took me off that pill."

Nell said, "So you just wanted to tell me about the painful hives on your penis?" 

"And butt."

The next day he apologized. "I think I flashed you," he said. "Sorry."

"You did, and apology accepted." Nell kept her eyes on her tablet. "Feeling better today?"

"Yup. And I know, dentist today."

"But you should be back to talking much quicker than the last one." 

He had that thing, like House on House M.D. 

"No, you don't," Nell said. "If you want, we can watch the episode specifically and I will point out to you all the ways that your injuries are different from the fictional Dr. House."

"But we both have that thing, with our muscles." Also, he would love to watch that episode of Dr. House again because frankly, Sela Ward was a major hottie. And Lisa Edelstein. 

"He had a stroke, the equivalent of, in his thigh muscle. You had a MRSA."

"He had to walk with a cane for all of his life," Marty said. He hated saying that. 

"Because what happened to him, the fictional him, I might remind you, and he did not receive proper treatment for four days." She tapped at her table until he looked up. "You are going to be an agent again. Everyone is sure."

"They're fairly sure," he said. "But thank you."

xx

The best part of the center was the days they let him swim. It was very good therapy. He just loved being able to move again, to swim. It was nothing like the ocean but it was the closest he would get. He almost felt strong again but only in the water. 

Everyone was very busy. He only saw Nell every other day. Sam came every three days with his juices. Sam being Sam, he came early in the morning and Marty slept 16 hours a day. He got to see Nate all the time. 

Kensi he saw twice a week. "Tell me about my replacement," he said. 

"Your temporary replacement," she said. "Are you having a little pity party here?" 

"Just a little. I'm concerned you guys are going to have all these in-jokes when I get back and no one will explain them to me, like the first day back from summer vacation and everyone else went to some fresh air camp and you didn't." 

She was sitting next to him on the bed while they watched House M.D. "Well, we already have one about you flashing Nell and saying painful rash on my penis."

"That one I would laugh at," he said. "Did I hallucinate you asking me to go on vacation with you?"

"Only if we both hallucinated the same thing," she said. 

"This is how we're doing this," he said.

"Doing what?"

"Dating? What comes after kissing?" 

"You know what comes after kissing," she said. She leaned against him, all warm and sunshiney and slightly sweaty smelling. "Yeah, I think that's what we're doing. We've got some things on hold while you get better. But then when we're on vacation, we'll figure it all out. For now, you know, I would appreciate if you didn't date any of the hot chicks you meet here."

"You can't, either. Not my replacement, not Callen or Nell, or Sabatino."

She turned to look at him. "You think I want to date Nell?"

"Who doesn't?"

She laughed.


	2. Chapter 2

Kensi is very travel agent-y about the whole thing. She actually prints out an itinerary for him with their flights and hotel reservations and rental cars. First stop Oklahoma City and then Anadarko (the 'Indian Capital of the Nation') for an Expo and then a tribal dance competition. "What's with all the Indigenous stops? It sounds totally cool but I didn't know you were into that. Are you into that?"

"It looked cool," Kensi says. She shrugs. "Do you need help packing?"

"No, I can pack for myself," he says. They're at his apartment. "You can spend the night, if you want to make sure."

"I could," she says, smiling. "I'm not going to. We'll be sharing a bed on vacation, though. I mean, it seemed easiest. Maybe it's not."

"No, I like it," he says. "We can just sleep together and figure out as we go along. I mean, sleeping, not euphemism for sex sleeping together." 

"Yeah," she says. "We'll figure it out."

She packs for him anyway. He falls asleep on the couch, wakes up propped up on the couch with his bags on the floor besides him. He looks through both bags and repacks them. Kensi sucks at packing. 

He misses Monty.

xx

 

She kisses him, with tongue, at LAX after they pass security. Then she steps back and blushes. "See," she says. "We're doing this."

He laughs and leans on his cane. "That was a good start until you ruined it with the see, we're doing this. I think we just do, I don't think we announce each step." 

"So you're saying we don't talk?" She winks at him. 

"No, not exactly." She starts walking to their terminal and he tries to keep up with her. It sucks, though. It's been the whole summer gone and he's barely even at half speed. He can take being tortured and he can take dying but fuck it, being weak is the worst. Before this shit, he could always run away, he thinks. 

He watches her ass in her jeans, Kensi's amazing butt. One of his favorite views. If he'd said that always run away thing to Nate, he wouldn't have gotten out therapy so quickly. 

They get to the terminal and he immediately sits down. Kensi sits down next to him. "Did you take your pills?"

"Yes, I did," he says. "I took them this morning and I have two to take when we board."

"For your flying anxiety." She smirks. She also leans her head on his shoulder, which he likes. 

"I'm not afraid of flying, I have no anxiety."

"Speaking of liars," she says. "And I mean you."

He is anxious. He does hate flying. It's worse when he's all fucked up. He keeps falling asleep and then the painkillers wear off and his leg throbs, his hip feels like it's being eaten by acid and he's being jabbed again in his jaw. Again. He wants to ask Kensi if she thinks he's getting better. He think he's getting better. He knows it. He's up and walking. The pain is actually less. It's good. It's better. 

Kensi pushes his hair behind his ear. "Don't do that," he says. "I have huge ears."

"Like Dumbo," she says. "I know a place you can get that fixed."

"I have bad memories of that place," he says. 

Someone waves them on in the first round of passengers. Thanks to his cane, he thinks. "Whoa, we got first class?"

Kensi grins and helps him into his seat. "I think we got a cute wounded guy upgrade."

"You mean, how sad that poor man looks with his cane and his big ears upgrade." 

Kensi is revelling in the size of her seat and ignoring his whining. As the flight attendant guides the rest of the passengers on, she stops to hand Kensi a tiny Perrier bottle. Kensi passes it to him. She says, "Take your pills now."

"Maybe I wanted Pellegrino. Or vodka." He takes his pills.

"You will not be drinking for a while," she says. 

He'd like to start a conversation about what a while means but he closes his eyes first. Then Kensi jostles him like a meanie and he opens his eyes. "Haven't we taken off yet?"

"We took off and flew all the way here. We're in Oklahoma, plane is landed." She's already standing with her backpack on her back and his bag over her shoulder. "You slept the whole time." 

He feels stiff everywhere and it takes him forever to stand up. He hobbles off the plane while Kensi walks next to him, describing the movie he missed. 

He feels overwhelmed. He sits down in the baggage claim and covers his face with his hands. He remembers the face of a young woman he saw once, walking out of the vet while he was walking in. She was about to cry and miserable and all he could think was that someday that would be him. Something would happen to Monty. Of all the horrible things he'd seen and had done to him, he was about to cry over a woman he saw at the vet five year(s) ago.

Kensi gently puts her hand on his shoulder. She doesn't say anything. He is determined not to be her new fucked up boyfriend. He says, "Whiny mood swings are a side effect from something I'm taking. That's what it says on the bottle, I can show you." He stands up and manfully grabs one of his bags. Now Kensi's only carrying five of their bags. 

She looks at him with her gentle face and he would really pay hard cash for her to smirk or tease him or say touche. But he smiles and follows her to rental car counter. 

Oklahoma is hot.

xx

It's their first night in that big double bed. Kensi is wearing adorable polka dotted boyshorts and a tee shirt and he is wearing significantly less cute underwear. The only scars on his chest are from being shot so he's got nothing to hide. Except he looks like Steve Rogers in Captain America before the super soldier serum. He doesn't look in the mirror much. He says, "Given my injuries I think I get the right side. Right?"

"Sure," Kensi says. 

"Not even going to fight? Come on, Kensi."

"Do you want me to fight?"

"A little yes," he says. 

"Do you want me to fight you about the side of the bed so we don't talk about sleeping in the same bed as not undercover but sort of dating?" She looks a little nervous herself.

"Maybe," he says. "Also, I am not currently supposed to do much stuff, so it's not like we're getting past first base."

"Aren't we already past first base?"

Marty stares at her. "Define your bases."

She does her embarrassed snort and says, "Okay. Let's do it in bed."

"Absolutely," he says. She lets him have the right side. He turns on his left side to look at her. "Fire away."

"First base is french kissing, 2nd base is touching over the clothes and 3rd is under the clothes."

He blinks. "So, the space between 3rd base and home is vast and contains multitudes of sexual acts."

"I guess," she says. "That's what they told me."

"Who's they? And when was this? Somewhere in the midwest, the 1950s?"

"Ha," she says. She inches forward and touches his chest. "Your turn."

"First base is heavy petting, dry humping, frottage, naked massage." He reaches over and cups her breast over her shirt. "This would be 2nd base for you, where I grew up 2nd base is handjobs, fingerfucking. 3rd base is blowjobs, eating out, as it were. As always, home is intercourse." She kisses him and they're pressed against each other. It's another fantastic kiss and her breast feels like heaven his hand, even through a thin layer of cotton. 

He pulls back and says, "I don't mean to --"

"You're exhausted," she says. Hot make out session turns to snuggling in the blink of an eye, Marty observes. 

"I am," he says. "But not tomorrow."

"Okay," she says. "Good plan."

xx

"I want to go to the Oklahoma bombing Memorial today," Kensi says. 

Marty thinks "why" and "really?" but he says, "Okay." 

She drives them. He doesn't say anything, she doesn't say anything. He decides to pretend it's an easy companionable silence. It almost is. But she knows he's not asking, he knows it, so the question hangs in the ether. 

It's predictably solemn. He's tired quickly, and he sits on a bench, letting Kensi go where she wants. He stares into space and pictures himself running, jumping, surfing, not using a cane. He pushes himself up and feels 80 years old as he hobbles to the gift shop. 

Kensi finds him as he's browsing books and looks at mugs. He says,"You want a mug from here?" 

"Not at all," Kensi says. She takes his hand and squeezes. "I'm good to go and I can tell you are."

"I'm old and decrepit, Kens. Tired after twenty minutes, can't think of any good jokes. Not that this place is funny, really." 

"You're not decrepit, you're recovering." She drives them back in another mostly companionable silence. Marty's pretty sure he falls asleep at least once. 

He's lying back on the hotel bed, staring at the ceiling, wondering how pathetic he'll be if he naps. He is definitely not going to bed at 2pm on his vacation in sunny Oklahoma. Kensi is lying next to him, looking at the ceiling. She says, "I wanted to go because of Jack."

"Oh," he says. "Was he from Oklahoma?"

"Yup," she says. "He and this friend of his, they used to talk about how the Marines needed better people, tough guys like them. They were going to join up together. Which is kind of a weird motivation, honestly. Middle school kids talking big."

"There's lots worse," Marty says. He looks at her perfect profile. Her hair is getting wavy in the humidity. 

"Yeah, he could have joined because girls love the uniform." She closes her eyes and rubs her temples.

"I was actually kidding about that, you know." 

"His friend died at the bombing. He was only 14. And Jack decided to join up as soon as he turned 18, and I met him and we fell in love and the end. You know the rest. Jack told me he never went to the Memorial and he wanted to. Before he left for Fallujah. I don't know, maybe he's gone since? But I went for him." Kensi rolls to her side, looking at him. She smiles. "Is that weird? Hey, we just started, whatever this is, let's go to this place I want to visit because of my ex-fiance." 

"Is that weird?" He can't roll on his side, or he shouldn't. That's his bad side. His bad leg, his rebuilt jaw. "Why would that be weird? Am I supposed to resent you still thinking about someone you loved? Wait, am I supposed to be a dick here?"

"You think it's a dick move to be upset I dragged you to somewhere incredibly depressing because of someone I dated before you? I'm not sure it would be."

He laughs. "You're wrong. Assholes get upset about that shit. People who think they own you or something."

"Someone you know?" She slides closer, lays her hand on his chest. 

"Yes, Nate, I was thinking of my father. And we're done with that, right?"

"Yeah," she mumbles. "Let's take a nap."

"Fantastic idea," he says. He puts his arm around her, pulling her closer. "Your hair looks so pretty in this weather."

"Shut up," she says.


	3. Chapter 3

Kensi insists that if they go out to eat, they have to go to restaurants that aren't chains. He doesn't understand her insistence. It's actually irritating as fuck to him as she searches Yelp and then drives around and around trying to find the right BBQ place. Their third day in Oklahoma City, they get stuck in traffic and take a wrong turn thanks to a detour and she's arguing with the GPS as they drive past two Burger Kings and a Sonic and he really wants to say "Why the fuck do we fucking have to go Ann's Chicken Fry House, I just want to fucking eat." He is fuming and irritated and he is ready to break up with her right there just so he doesn't have to spend one more minute in the car. 

They finally make it and park. Kensi turns to him and says, "Aren't you going to say it? Whatever you have stored up in there? I can tell you're incredibly pissed. You're sulking."

"Of course I am, this is ridiculous." He closes his eyes. "I won't be this angry later and I'll just wait instead of something stupid and mean like saying I'm sulking."

She says, "Saying you're sulking is mean?" He opens his eyes and she looks remarkably calm. She says, "Do you do that a lot?"

"Sulk? Cause I don't sulk, Kens."

She grins. "You absolutely do. But I mean, just keep your mouth shut until you're not as angry. I didn't realize --" She looks down. "It was my dad's rule when we went to new places. No chains. No restaurants we recognized. Sorry."

He opens the door and starts to negotiate getting out of the car while using the cane. The restaurant smells really good. Like delicious fried things. He says, "Don't be sorry. And yes, it's my usual m.o., you just don't usually make me that mad." 

She leans on the car waiting for him to come around to her side. "Guess I should work harder."

"Please don't," he says. He's not angry anymore, but instead he has the kind of headache and rot in his leg that won't go away until he lies down for his afternoon nap. He smiles anyway and they walk into the restaurant. 

xx

They go swimming at the hotel every single morning after the first. Marty only brought two pairs of board shorts. He washes them in the bathroom sink. Kensi, though, she has splurged big time. Maybe she had four bikinis and two one pieces before this vacation, but he really doubts it. 

She comes out of the bathroom every morning in her bright sarong cover up and so he doesn't get to see today's bathing suit until they're at the hotel pool. He eases in the water and then watches her. She slips off her sarong and grins at him, every time. Day one she has this white bikini with images on them like sepia photos. There's an honest to God ferris wheel over her crotch. The next day there's a one piece that reminds him of her sundress when they were married. Then it's another bikini in pastel blue, not nearly as revealing as the first one, but still unbelievably sexy. 

He does the physical therapy he's supposed to do in the pool and then he swims. Kensi worries, sitting on the edge, her feet going back and forth in anxiety. "Don't push too hard. You don't want to set anything back." 

xx

Marty is saying something hilarious while they get dressed to go out for dinner and Kensi is laughing until she isn't. She says, "And why was singing for me suddenly something you were scared of doing? You used to sing in the car all the time."

"Right up until we were married and you said, and I quote, what was that like you'd smelled black bear shit." 

Kensi frowns. "We weren't actually married and I don't even remember saying that."

"I was giving you the context of the statement. Our second morning we were undercover married, I come out of the shower and you said that." He is possibly being angrier than he needs to be about this. 

"I'm not a morning person," Kensi says. "Have you really been holding that against me for over a year? Oh my God. You are such a child."

"I'm a child? I'm a child. Do I need to bring up how you reacted to Monica?" 

"Are you kidding me?" She sits down in one of their brown chairs and stares at the ceiling. Then she starts smiling. 

"That is really irritating," he says. 

"Smiling? Sorry, I was just thinking about how much I missed this when I saw you, waiting for you in the hospital." She keeps smiling. "I'm glad you're alive. To be wrong." She shrugs. "Or right, I'm not even sure what we're arguing about."

"Oh, I'm right," he says. He stands up abruptly from the bed and realizes he needs his cane to do this properly. Kensi is still smiling her aggravating Mother Theresa smile as she springs up and hands him the stupid fucking cane. "Thank you, and I am right. You're childish."

"So're you," she says. Now her smile is more amused. "You stopped singing because one more morning I was cranky at you singing in the shower? It was Ice Ice Baby. Come on."

"You do remember!" He points his cane at her. "So, fine, it's a little childish. But I value your opinion."

"So I shouldn't have negative ones," she says. Now she's smirking.

"I don't think you should be surprised if your negative opinions discourage me from expressing myself," he says. "By the way, we can't settle arguments by you giving up because I'm not dead. Because that will wear off."

"We could stop talking until we're ready to be calm," she says.

"It's not a bad strategy," he says. 

"It's not a great one," she says. "Maybe we should go with it for now. We have time to work this out, you know. Right?"

"We're partners, we're sort of dating or we're actually dating, shouldn't we be able to argue?"

Kensi shrugs. "We're doing fine so far. I'm not worried. Are you worried?"

"Fine," he says. 

She stands up and walks to the door. "Dinner?" They go and eat at a local BBQ place.

xx

The day after they go to the Cowboy Museum, Kensi wakes up, puts her new cowboy hat on her head and rolls on over on top of Marty. "Hey, you," she says. 

She straddles him and wiggles her insanely hot body and that Kensi smell all over her is all he notices. She sits up a little, pressing her crotch against his already hard dick. She pops a mint in her mouth and offers him one. He nods and opens his mouth. She places it delicately on his tongue. He chews twice and swallows. 

He grabs her firm butt. "So what are we doing here?"

She lies down on top of him. "Morning make out? Was that not obvious?"

"Oh, it was obvious. I like, you know, knowing where we're going."

She kisses him. The mint is overwhelming. He pushes his hands under her panties to get a good grip on her. She wiggles again to make it easier for him. They kiss, he squeezes her butt, she laughs a little and he makes very happy sounds. 

Then she slips off him and pulls off the sheets. "Let's round a base," she says. 

It's basically the best handjob ever, possibly of his life. He's biased since it's Kensi and he hasn't had sex in a very long while and also, it's Kensi. 

"You now?" He says. 

"Save it for tonight," she says, springing off the bed. "Up for a swim?"

"In a minute," he mumbles. 

That night, she blushes and looks at the ceiling as he starts to pull her underwear down. He stops. He says, "You okay?"

"Just you know, naked, in front of you." She laughs and glances at him. "Which is ridiculous."

"It's not, but it's slightly, Kensi, you have a tank top on." He rests his hand on her stomach. 

"You know what I mean," she says. "I guess, you know, when I pictured this, both of us were usually drunk and sometimes it was in a car." 

"Sobriety and bright lights are worrying you? You have a fantastic body, Kens." He says, "Also you were thinking about me in the shower. Secondly, I was totally naked this morning, not even a tank top."

"I know," she says. "I know! But it's, you know. It's you." She finally looks at him and smiles. "It's you." She kisses him and pushes off her underwear. 

"Okay," he says. He pulls her underwear all the way off and then sits at the bottom of the bed. "After all that, I feel like I should really make sure that you're very very pleased." He caresses her legs and then tugs her down the bed until her thighs are resting on his shoulders. "Are we good?"

"Oh, yeah," she says. "Yeah." He moves in closer. "Yup, yup," she says. Then he's making her happy enough she stops making words and just pants. 

She comes loudly, and then lies on the bed all floppy and spent. "I feel proud," he says, getting back up on the bed. 

"Hmm, you should," she says. "Now our partnership is totally ruined."

"Because I went down on you? Again, why isn't it ruined with a handjob?" He laughs. 

"Because I've already seen all of you," she says, sitting up. 

"When was that?"

"You know, just the usual. Changing out of your wetsuit when you sneak in surfing breaks, other times." Kensi is blushing again. "I look, okay? You got me, I think you're attractive."

"I hope so," he says. "And trust me, sweetness, I've seen it all, too, before this. But this time we were touching said all of this. But you're good, right? Actually for real good?"

"Yes," Kensi says. "Aren't you?"

"I'm excellent. This," he says, running his hand down her side, "Is something I wanted for a long time. And it's better with bright lights and both of us sober."

"You're charming," she says. "I guess, I just. What we're doing is big."

"Definitely," he says. "Big and awesome."

"Changing stuff," she says. 

"Changing to awesome," he says. 

"Let's go to sleep," she says. 

"Awesome," he says. 

They stick to third base by his reckoning for the rest of the week. Frenzied, super hot third base action that make every day worth living. "We are also having deep and intimate conversations," he says. 

"Yup," Kensi says. She gets off the bed and starts packing for Anadarko. 

xx

 

Their next argument is on the drive to Anadarko. In Marty's opinion, they're both cranky and hot and tired of spending every hour of every day together after only one week. In Kensi's opinion, Marty has too many opinions like he can read Kensi's mind and knows her better than she knows herself, which is complete bullshit, in her opinion. 

They're barely speaking by the time they get to the hotel. Kensi says, "I'm going out. You get the room. I'll be back."

"Promise?" He says it and it sounds pathetic even to him. 

She walks over and kisses him. "Promise," she says, looking 50% less cranky.

"Aren't you glad I'm alive?" 

"Yes, and also shut up, oh my god," she says. She doesn't slam the door, though. 

He watches baseball until he falls asleep. He wakes up when Kensi turns the tv off and gets in the bed beside him.

xx

 

The hotel in Anadarko has an outside pool. He still swims every morning. He's at that magic apex moment when he's almost better and he can taste it so he will be swimming every day. "Also," Kensi says. "You're very likely to re-injure yourself because you're, you know, so excited to not be injured." 

"Just swimming," he says. He doesn't even try to be fancy or show off his sweet syncho diving moves he's been practicing since 2012. They'd be cooler with a partner, but in his head, he knows he's perfectly in sync with his imaginary partner. 

He's so uninjured, he's regained his whimsy. He says to her, "So where do all the swank swimsuits come hence from?"

"Hence?" Kensi blinks a few times. "Actually, Hetty tricked me into it. Me and Nell. She had us scout all these websites and catalogs to 'help' Hetty buy some chic new ones. Strangely enough, when she ordered them they were only in my size or Nell's."

"She couldn't just give them to you?"

"Technically, I'm just testing them." She slips down in the pool and wraps her legs around his hips. "Did you know short shorts board shorts are totally in style? I should have gotten you some."

"I would rock them," he says. "I have fantastic legs. Daniel Craig level legs."

"Eh," Kensi says. "You will soon. Keep up the swimming."

xx

"We could also sit in all day and watch the Golden Girls or Friends all day," Kensi says. She's flipping through the channels. She looks good doing it. "We could finally have sex." She has her eyes trained on the tv.

"Do you honestly think we haven't had sex yet? My dick has been in your mouth. We've had hands, like, everywhere. There's been a little butt involved."

"You do not have a little butt," she says, laughing. "I mean that in the nicest way." Now she looks at him. "Ha, I know what you mean. I just mean, we haven't done the deed."

"Yeah, we haven't done anything that would make a baby, but I'm okay with that. We keep joking about bases, but I'm cool with what we're doing. It's not a race. Or like, notches or a ladder. Unless you think it is and there's some reason you're holding back." He sits next to her on the bed. "I can keep talking."

"Please don't," she says. "I don't think there's some deep reason we haven't had, we haven't done that. Besides that we just started dating. Or whatever."

"We're dating," he says. "No whatever."

"Agreed," she says. "That's still weird, though."

"Yup," he says. "Good weird."

"Definitely," Kensi says. 

"That conversation went well," he says. "We can go to the expo, we can watch Friends, or we can have what you consider sex as opposed to everything else we've done in the past week or so."

"I like sex," Kensi says. 

"I like that idea a lot," Marty says. He pulls off his shirt and takes off his jeans. 

"Fast work, Apollo," she says, smirking.

"You think you're hilarious," he says. 

"Wait, though," she says, with her bra half off. She shrugs it off. "You're still recovering. Should you, maybe if you're on the bottom."

"OKAY," he says. "Condom?"

"Shit," she says. She puts her bra back on. And her shirt. It's sad, but he knows there will be sex after. "I'm getting some."

"We should have been using them before," he says. as she heads out the door. "For safety sake. Which we haven't been and you're already out in the parking lot." 

She comes back in record time and jumps back on the bed. "Condom," she says. 

"Excellent," he says. Kensi strips quickly and starts working on his clothes. "So not going slow," he says, getting his pants off. 

"Years of going slow," she mutters. "Done with that." She pushes him down on his back, lying down on top of him. 

She really is done with slow. Her idea of foreplay this time is kissing him, sitting up on his thighs, licking her hand and giving him a very intent handjob. As soon as he's good and hard, she puts the condom on and lowers herself onto him. It's extremely satisfying. 

He says, breathing heavily, "You are really into this."

She says, "I like fucking you." 

It takes time to finish, sweet humid time. Kensi lies on the bed next to him after, and she even falls asleep. He showers and turns on the tv to the Friends marathon.


	4. Chapter 4

The night before they leave, Marty takes over packing from Kensi. "Let's just say, you're not amazing at this."

"Fine, whatever." She lounges in the chair and plays a game on her tablet. 

He carefully packs all their souvenirs and hats and gifts. 

Since he's not using his cane now, they don't get the upgrade coming home. He takes his pills again but doesn't fall asleep immediately this time. The seats aren't nearly as easy to nod off in, he thinks. Also he's been titrating his dose as he's supposed to, his pain is down, he's practically a new man. He's not quite his old self, but he can see that guy at the end of the tunnel. 

"So," Kensi says. "I kinda can't wait to get home. And have more sex."

"You sound like a 15 year old," he says. "Still, clearly a sign we're definitely dating and doing it well. Successful vacation? I think so."

"We're doing it well, I don't know about the relationship part." She fakes a smile like she's trying to be reassuring. It's an adorable attempt. 

"How are we doing dating badly? I feel confident. We got this. We've argued. We've made up. We spent hours together, days even. We bought a lot of gifts for others and things for ourselves directly from the Native Americans who made those things and saw some incredibly amazing dances that we were invited to watch --"

"Do not disagree," Kensi says. "I told you Anadarko was a good choice."

"We didn't actually argue about that, I mean, I never said there was anything wrong with Anadarko or any part of your plan." 

"I just wanted to note," she says. "See, we're kinda arguing now."

"But not really. And if it escalates, you can think about how I'm still alive or we can have make up sex." He takes her hand in his. He may not have fallen asleep this time, but he's still feeling really calm about everything. 

"Weren't you the one who said that's going to wear off?" She squeezes his hand, though. 

"I did. So we'll do something else. And I am pretty sure the sex will never wear off," he says. 

She laughs. "So we're doing this," she says. 

"We're rocking this," he says.

Back in LA, he insists they go to Julia's first. "A man needs his dog. He needs his stalwart companion."

"More than his girlfriend," Kensi says, grinning. 

"I miss Monty," he says. Monty missed him, bless him. He comes running out of the house and if he were bigger and younger, he would have tackled Marty to the ground. But Marty is strong and instead they meet in the middle. There is much hugging (Marty) and licking (Monty) and barking (both).

Kensi drives them both to his house. She stands in the door. "Want me to stay?"

"Do you want to stay?"

"If you want me to," she says. "I mean, it's been two weeks putting up with each other."

"I like putting up with you," he says. 

"Good," she says. "But I am going home. I am not going to unpack right away. Maybe not for days." 

He shudders and then kisses her goodbye. 

"So we went to Oklahoma," Marty says to Monty. "It was pretty good. And I'm just a month, two maybe, away from being a fully functioning cop." Monty barks. "But yeah, first we take you for a walk."


End file.
